What they call, SPILLING OF THE BEANS!

Some of you know that I lost my oldest son, Ty, in 2001.  He was my first child, born when I was 24 years old.  Much to my surprise, he had Down Syndrome, and many heart defects as a result.  I was floored when I learned he had Downs. I thought that was only for old moms with dried up eggs, right?  Not for me.

I fell in love with him behind the glass walls that were our room at St Louis Children’s Hospital.  Like a spectacle at the zoo, we resided there behind that glass as our lives unfolded.  I lost myself there;  somewhere amidst the sanitizers, beeps, alarms and my own melted body (I gained 60 pounds.  It was ugly!) and weakened spirit. 

Ty died suddenly after a routine cardiac catheterization, one day before my 25^th birthday.  It was just supposed to be an outpatient procedure, but it turned out to be the worst day of my life.   I walked out of that hospital in shock, wondering how I could ever live without him.  It seemed as though I had just gotten used to our new ‘normal’.  Now, in a flash, it was gone. 

It only took a few days for the miracles to begin, as Ty sent me the first sign that he was always by my side:  A butterfly.  It was that day that my life changed forever, as I began to feel God’s presence by my side through my grief.  He allowed me the chance to ‘speak’ to Ty again, to feel him there with me, to know that I wasn’t alone.

Soon after, words began to flow through my head like water from a faucet.  I found myself writing through my grief, and found it to be exactly what I needed to heal.  Over the course of 10 years, I have found myself again.  I have found my sense of humor, my relationship with God, and I have almost found my waist again…LOL

It was a long journey, a tough journey, but one I wouldn’t trade for anything.

I can now look over my shoulder and see just where I have been.  I can appreciate it for all that it is, all that it has done for me, and all that I am because of it.  It has made me a person I am proud to be.  It gave me a lot of gray hair, sure.  But, I roll with it, and count on my good friend Amy to just keep making me blonder to cover it! LOL

It has taken me 10 years, lots of tissues, and probably shaved a few years off of my life…

But I have FINALLY published a book about my journey!  I promise you it isn’t all death and destruction.  It’s as light-hearted as it can be,  and is actually humorous, believe it or not.  It’s not all sadness, and it’s not all preaching.  It’s just me, being ME, and telling my story.

It’s not just for people who have lost a child.  I truly believe that everyone has times in their life that bring them to their knees.  Sometimes, it’s not that event that is most important.  It’s making the conscious decision to either get back up and keep going or just stay on the ground and die. 

So, here’s the scoop.  The book is called:

 

                           "Sit Down, Shut Up and Let Go!" 

A Guide To Losing Control

One mother's humorous memoir of the adventures of LIFE.

 Making it through unthinkable loss, undeniable miracles,

and arriving at unimaginable wholeness.

It is available at the following online retailers:

Westbowpress.com

Barnesandnoble.com

Amazon.com

 If you take a look at Westbowpress.com, you can actually get a sneak preview of the book, and some additional tidbits of info. 

I literally just got my first shipment of books yesterday.  They are HOT off the press!  Public appearances and book signings are in the works.  I will be posting links to an official facebook page, twitter page, blog and website very soon. 

Want an autographed copy?  Hit me up!  Got some ideas on marketing, appearances, etc?  Well, don’t be an idea hog!  TELL ME!

I’m excited to finally spill the beans.  PHEW! 

What a weight that has been lifted.  It’s like a diet for my brain! 

Love you guys.  Thanks for coming along on my journey…It’s scary inside of my head sometimes.  I’m glad you are brave enough to stick around!  Grab a cup of coffee and this book, and let's snuggle!  HAAAAAAHAAAAAHAAAAA!